A Threesome is it really possible? Or is it the unicorn of sexual experiences?

feetWhat I mean by that is we’ve all seen a threesome played out on film whether it’s m/f/m or f/m/f or three guys or three women, but I don’t think it plays out the way it’s shown on screen I mean obviously on film there is someone there to yell cut and position everyone involved so that the action is shown in just the right way.

Can it be something else though. Can there be a deeper meaning? An emotional attachment that makes it more than just who’s body part fits where? Or would that create too much jealousy. Can you love two people equally or with there always be someone who takes the lead.

We are such complex creatures with a host of desires and needs but I think more than anything it’s our brain that gets in the way of pursuing what our hearts and bodies want. Society has also played a large part in telling us what is forbidden or taboo but as I write my next novel I’m finding more and more that the blinders I may have once worn are being ripped away.

Love vs. Lust…Emotion vs Sex

body-143798_640In writing it can be a hard choice to make and the words an author uses can make all the difference. I write romance, yes it’s erotic with plenty of naughty bits, but at its core it’s still romance. It’s the happily ever after that drives me. It the journey that my characters take me on.

I strive for my characters to be as real as possible with authentic emotions. I want readers to feel their joy and heartbreak. I want them to feel the thrill of the chase and the characters confusion as they struggle to work through their issues.

If I’m doing my job properly then as a reader you tear up with them, and feel the throb of their desire as if it’s your own.

What drives the story forward then? What keeps us on the edge of our seats squirming in anticipation? What keeps those pages turning hour after hour?

Is it the way that a sexual encounter is described in finite detail? Or is it the emotional journey the gritty details in watching someone be torn down as they realize unknown things about themselves.

I actually hope it’s both. I hope that the image painted with my words is provocative enough to make you squirm while the emotion of the story leaves you warm and satisfied.

To be explicit or not to be explicit? That is the question.

I know it’s not what Shakespeare was talking about but it’s been on my mind lately. Do people read books with erotic themes simply because they are explicit? I mean sex sells right? I’ve said it myself when discussing my writing. Does it need to be explicit though? Is it the way that body parts and touching are described that keeps the pages turning?

A very dear friend of mine recently told me that I’m a great writer and they could see me eventually branching out into something more meaty, but here’s the thing I like romance and to me erotic romance if done right feels more real and authentic to me. Lets face it we all love to be in love and often spend a large portion of our lives chasing after love. Who wouldn’t want to be a fly on the wall witnessing two people in the throws of passion.

Maybe it isn’t something we ever get to see in our real lives outside of fantasy and porn, but in our minds it can be anything the fantasy can dirty and primal and make your muscles tense with longing.

Do you need to say cock instead of penis? Or describe in detail the texture of a woman’s nipple against your tongue. Have we progressed past the flowery purple prose or are there still somethings that make us squirm? Words we can’t say? Words we won’t say? Words are very powerful I just happen to think the explicit ones make things more interesting.

BDSM and Writing

I read a lot. I always have nowadays it’s for research as well as for enjoyment purposes. In the novel I’m currently features a BDSM theme. I was a bit reluctant to venture too deeply into the world of BDSM due to all the backlash from FSOG but I”m glad that I have.

I find myself trying to answer “What does my character get out of this relationship?” I find myself struggling to answer though because I believe that sex is multifaceted and dynamic thing. I think if you can pigeonhole what you get out of it you’re probably doing it wrong.

So as I continue to write and take my characters on their journey my search continues for real and compelling BDSM experiences that will inspire my characters to boldly embrace their pleasure no matter what form it comes in.